Saturday, May 19, 2012

this time is different

September 16, 2008




"God investigate my life; 
get all the facts firsthand. 
I'm an open book to you; 
even from a distance, you know what I'm thinking.
You know when I leave and when I get back;
I'm never out of your sight.
You know everything I'm going to say
before I start the first sentence. 
I look behind me and you're there, 
then up ahead and you're there too-
your reassuring presence, coming and going.
This is too much, too wonderful-
I can't take it all in!

Is there anyplace I can go to avoid your Spirit?
to be out of your sight?
If I climb to the sky, you're there!
Id I go underground, you're there!
If I flew on morning's wings
to the far eastern horizon, 
You'd find me in a minute-
you're already there waiting!
Then I said to myself, "Oh, he even sees me in the dark!
At night I'm immersed in the light!
It's a fact: darkness isn't dark to you; 
night and day, darkness and light, they're 
all the same to you.

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.
I thank you, High God- you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration- what a creation!
You know me inside and out, 
you know every bone in my body;
you know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, 
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow
from conception to birth'
all the stages of my life were spread out
before you, 
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.

Your thoughts-how rare, how beautiful!
God, I'll never comprehend them!
I couldn't even begin to count them-
any more than I can count the sand of
the sea.
Oh, let me rise in the morning and live always with you!
And please, God, do away with wickedness
for good!"
-Psalm 139:1-18-

I cannot tell you how many times I have come across, learned about, and memorized this passage in the 19 years that I have known the Lord....and yet tonight when I read it, it mean something completely different to me...

That is the beautiful thing about my God. He is never done teaching me and growing me. There is always something new He wants to show me and I just love it when He finds a way to get it through to me!

I have always wondered, why when people say they can feel the presence of God, I don't necessarily feel anything extra special. I mean I love to worship and just pray and spend time with Him, but I could never really figure out that phrase...

That passage just sank into my heart tonight. 

The presence of God never leaves me. In fact, I have never known a day in my life without His presence going before me and surrounding me. He is like a dear old friend. Not only does He know the rhythm and longing of my heartbeats...He is what causes my heart to keep beating!

And as we grow old together, I am starting to learn His heartbeat. To hear it and feel it...it's becoming mine. 

I pray that as I learn and grow daily....my best friend will always go with me and that in time and in grace...it will be impossible to hear two heartbeats...they will have become one. 

I am just so very thankful that creator of the universe...of galaxies and seas and more than 6 billion humans...calls me His best friend and delights in the fact that I call Him mine. 

How blessed am I to know a love like that. 

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